Why The Last Year Has Been the Most Formative of My Life
The last few months have been a period of deep integration after a series of deeply transformative experiences. I have been reflecting on how much my sense of things has evolved; how I am changing, how the world is changing. This post will point at a few of the more formative and distinctly notable pieces that contributed to this evolution — inevitably entangled with wider shifts, subtler influences, and the innumerable day-to-day encounters that also ripple through me.
Retracing the Journey
2022 afforded so many opportunities for growth.. It was the year of engaging, settling into my first long-term home since I went to college, coming out of social-constraint from Covid, becoming a UX researcher and taking on some of my biggest freelance projects, getting to know Longmont, planting a vegetable garden, attending my first Rainbow Gathering, going on a 3-night sea kayaking adventure, painting a mural, hosting potluck dinners… and more. All of these hold notable lessons and beauty but for now I’m going to focus on a few key endeavors that shaped my relationship with life, with modernity, with humanity.
2022 was the year I dove deep into the vast pool that is Effective Altruism (EA). After hearing some podcasts, reading a book or two, and instigating a few local meetups, I found myself stepping in as the lead organizer for EA Colorado. I was drawn to the rational, conclusive-feeling ideology that there is a framework one can use to arrive at clear and directed paths to channel resources such that they can have an immense positive impact. And that there are thousands of incredibly smart people discussing the applications of this framework to crowdsource the most impactful ways to direct our time, careers and money. Feeling connected to this movement felt supportive and nurturing. It provoked a deep dive into surveying the landscape of challenges humanity faces. And yet throughout this time I continued to be involved in Ecoversities, an Earth-centric web of learning communities and leaders shaping the very definition of knowledge. The cultural contrast between EA and Ecoversities, was at times, dizzying. EA prioritizes rationality, data and analysis where Ecoversities focuses on relationality, heart, and deeper, more intuitive forms of knowing. EA uses intellectual rigor to arrive at often linear conclusions on the ‘best’ solutions while Ecoversities uses intuition and holistic awareness to weave into the web of life.
In June, and for weeks leading up to it, I participated in what I lovingly refer to as ‘Complexity Camp’ at a summer camp outside Toronto. It was the fourth iteration of Think Better’s emergent gathering of weavers, coaches, and designers playing at the leading edge of systems awareness and deep collaboration. It was a week filled with stimulating conversations, circling, jumping in the lake, group meditation, canoeing, dancing around fires, and stargazing. It brought to life a web of 25 passionate people deeply thinking about the state of things and how to contribute to positive-sum futures. This crew continues to be a group of people I’m learning with and we’ve got some exciting projects cooking. More on this soon.
Afterwards I came home to kick off the 8-week Roote Fellowship I co-facilitated with Rhys Lindmark. We were weaving together content on systems change, the ethics of ‘doing good’, and entrepreneurial spiritedness. We had an amazing cohort of inspired early-career professionals who each brought diverse contexts to our learning journey. As a group we peered into the world of Web3 and DAOs, mutual aid circles, diversity and inclusion efforts, how technology can support Nigerian farmers, and different ways of caring for people we cross paths with.
In September, days after the fellowship ended, I headed to the mountains for an Intergenerational Women’s Fast hosted by two incredible women from the School of Lost Borders. This 7-day container included a 72-hour solo fast on the land as an invitation to drop into deeper connection with the more-than-human world. This ancient practice felt like a homecoming, like stepping over a threshold into a clearer way of seeing Life Itself and my place within it. I can’t, wouldn’t want to, share the whispered wisdom this experience offered me and yet I’d be remiss to not mention it. And so I plant it as a seed for you to consider — what would the wild world reveal to you if you gave yourself space to truly listen?
In November I spent a month in Puerto Rico with 3 of the humans I feel most connected to in life these days: Sierra whom I know through Ecoversities, Naryan who instigated Complexity Camp, and Benya, my partner, lover, life adventure companion. The four of us dropped into a group flow, a collective identity of sorts, attuned to the same sense of mystery and wonder; purpose and inquiry. We hosted a 6-day retreat. We met dozens of people and played matchmaker whenever it felt right. Knowing I can’t do this journey justice in so few words I’ll wrap up by saying that it offered an immersive, cohering of perspectives of life and what’s unfolding that was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. It opened possibilities of deeper forms of relating and learning than I had yet experienced in life.
Benya and I returned to Colorado in December… digesting, reorienting. It had been such a ride. So much had changed and yet we found ourselves returning to the familiar house that feels like home. I found myself reaching for other orientation points… how does one stay aware of such a dynamic and rapidly changing world when our sense of things is so subjective?
I am excited to continue writing on what happened next, to weave some of the threads all of this potent experiences have brought forward. But for now I will let the story rest. Invite an exhale, a walk.
